In hommage to the tracks on Appetite for Destruction, over the next 12 days leading up to the Grammy Awards Auction (Feb. 6),  I’ll profile (and poke fun at) others, like Guns N' Roses, that ascended to musical royalty and then became fodder for this blog.

Track 5: “Mr. Brownstone” ... Dedicated to Amy Winehouse

Amy Winehouse was only 4 years old and an ocean away when Slash and Izzy Stradlin wrote “Mr. Brownstone” while sitting around complaining to each other about being heroin addicts. Brownstone is a slang term for heroin.

And as we’ve all read, Mrs. Winehouse, who originally signed with American Idol Simon Fuller’s company (19 Management), allegedly loves her some heroin … and some crack …. and some ecstasy … and some …. well you get the point.

Wasn’t it only a year ago that a 24-year-old Winehouse owned the 50th Grammy Awards taking home five trophies? It was a first for a British singer. Remember, how she somehow kept herself upright via a satellite link from London and blew through “Rehab” and “You Know I’m No Good”? Satellite link? Oh yeah, did you forget how she was denied a visa. Probably a heartbreaker to the airline company that would have dealt with her “locked” in a tube for six to eight hours.

And who was able to keep the tears from streaking down their face when she dedicated the Record of the Year trophy to her jailed husband, “My Blake. My Blake incarcerated.” The other half of this Sid and Nancy pair, Blake Fielder-Civil, who has been quoted as saying he introduced Winehouse to crack and heroin, had to blow kisses from the confines of his prison cell where he’s serving time for assault and perverting the course of justice.

The Grammy winning Back to Black sold 5.1 million copies in 2008.

Since grabbing Grammy gold, the singer ... with tattered tresses, fangs and looking like the evil offspring of Jim Carrey’s In Living Color character Vera de Milo and Motley Crue’s Nikki Sixx ... has become a tabloid darling. Hospitalizations. Drug overdoses. Cancelled concerts. Self-harm. Hell, she even missed her own 25th birthday party.

Forget who will win the toss during the Super Bowl … what kind of action can I get on when she’ll join the list of talented, but conflicted musicians who left without an encore (Jim Morrison, Kurt Cobain, John Bonham, Janis Joplin)?

Slash despite a few setbacks and the help of MusiCares was finally able to kick his habit. So there is hope for Winehouse, but only if she chooses to leave “Mr. Brownstone” … and file down those teeth.

Monday (Feb. 2, 2009): “Paradise City” … Dedicated to American Idol 

51st Annual Grammy Awards Live Charity Auction
When: Feb. 6, 2009
Where: Los Angeles, Calif.
Auction Time: 8pE/5pP
What's The Deal?: The items assembled represent over 70 years of music history from early jazz greats to rock 'n' roll legends. The auction features the generously donated collection of producer Andy Budde, with an extensive amount of Rolling Stones and Beatles memorabilia. Also up for bid are stage-played guitars from David Bowie and Eric Clapton, as well as Frank Sinatra and Elton John signed recording contracts and memorabilia from Bob Dylan. A 20% buyer's premium will be added to the hammer price on individual lots $50,000 and higher, and a 25% buyer's premium on all individual lots of $0-$49,000. There will be an additional 3% buyer's premium charged for lots won on Auction Network.
Register: Click here
View Catalog: Click here      

In hommage to the tracks on Appetite for Destruction, over the next 12 days leading up to the Grammy Awards Auction (Feb. 6),  I’ll profile (and poke fun at) others, like Guns N' Roses, that ascended to musical royalty and then became fodder for this blog.

Track 4: “Out Ta Get Me” ... Dedicated to Chris Gaines

The GNR lyrics for “Out Ta Get Me” are based on the constant legal troubles lead singer Axl Rose faced while growing up in Indiana where skrawny kids with long red hair and tats sort of stood out.  So as I started looking for a Grammy blog to coincide with track four from Appetite, it became apparent if I focused on the “menace to society” angle I’d be writing until next year’s Grammy Awards. Not everyone is as angelic as Josh Groban.

Instead I’m tackling the song from a schizophrenia angle … well sort of.

In the 19th century, psychologists coined the phrase for people with a second self. In layman’s terms, they thought they were more than one person … sometimes at the same time. Real Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde stuff. Internal battle for control between two opposing view points or moral compasses.

One of the funniest moments in Animal House focuses on this when Pinto is trying to decide how to end the evening with a passed out supermarket cashier. He gets advice from both good and bad Pintos. In the end, good triumphs and the dean’s daughter returns home, albeit in a shopping card, untouched.

In an industry full of escentric musicians who sometimes go by single names (Cher, Madonna, Celine) or one name that isn’t their God-given one (Bono, Edge, Pink) is it really a stretch to see David Bowie become Ziggy Stardust or Miley Cyrus transform into Hannah Montana? At least they became other people. Prince had to turn himself in a symbol. Marshall Mathers channels Eminem and Slim Shady (for his more violent raps).

To bring a harder edge to songs on The Breakthrough, Mary J. Blige “became” the crazy Brook-Lyn. Just imagine Thanksgiving at the Blige house: 

Mom: "Mary, you looked a little ... um ... nasty in your video for 'Enough Cryin.'"

Mary: "Nasty?"

Mom: "Yeah, with that hootchie shirt all tied up and showing your belly."

Mary: "Oh come on now mom, that was Brook-Lyn; not me. Please pass the gravy."

But one of the more baffling “transformations” occurred in 1999 when Chris Gaines was born.

Around that time Garth Brooks had released his seventh studio album, Sevens, and was enjoying his usual multi-million sales celebrations. Sevens was his fourth album to reach sales of 10 million copies. In all, Brooks has sold over 128 million albums.

Yet there was something missing. Or calling him from somewhwere inside his Wranglers.

In a move that showed Brooks was born in Tulsa, Okla., with a bronze pair to go with his golden touch, he and his production company developed a movie, The Lamb, that revolved around a fictional rock singer Chris Gaines. And who better to “play” Gaines than Brooks who had already combined some of his rock roots (he credits KISS as an early influence) into stage shows never seen before in Nashville, Tenn.

To create a buzz for the project, Brooks/Gaines wrote and released the album The Life of Chris Gaines, appeared as Gaines in a segement of VH1’s Behind the Music and served as musical guest on Saturday Night Live (when Brooks served as guest host).

Brooks’ fans were left feeling like friends in low places? What the hell was going on? Had the pop in Brooks finally kicked the crap out of his country boy?

While the album peaked at No. 2 on the charts and produced Brooks' first … and only … United States top 40 single in “Lost in You,” retailers couldn’t give the album away after the initial rush. The Lamb never made it to the screen. And Gaines disappeared from public view.

I would have liked to have seen Brooks/Gaines pull it together. I'm not a big country fan, but I've always liked Brooks and his ability to cross those lines between country and rock. His version of "Hard Luck Woman" on Kiss My Ass: Classic Kiss Regrooved, was better than the Peter Criss version.

Who knows, but when Brooks returns from self-retirement maybe we'll get to see a little more of Gaines even if he's shaved his soul patch.

Tomorrow (Jan. 30, 2009): “Mr. Brownstone” … Dedicated to Amy Winehouse 

51st Annual Grammy Awards Live Charity Auction
When: Feb. 6, 2009
Where: Los Angeles, Calif.
Auction Time: 8pE/5pP
What's The Deal?: The items assembled represent over 70 years of music history from early jazz greats to rock 'n' roll legends. The auction features the generously donated collection of producer Andy Budde, with an extensive amount of Rolling Stones and Beatles memorabilia. Also up for bid are stage-played guitars from David Bowie and Eric Clapton, as well as Frank Sinatra and Elton John signed recording contracts and memorabilia from Bob Dylan. A 20% buyer's premium will be added to the hammer price on individual lots $50,000 and higher, and a 25% buyer's premium on all individual lots of $0-$49,000. There will be an additional 3% buyer's premium charged for lots won on Auction Network.
Register: Click here
View Catalog: Click here      

In hommage to the tracks on Appetite for Destruction, over the next 12 days leading up to the Grammy Awards Auction (Feb. 6),  I’ll profile (and poke fun at) others, like Guns N' Roses, that ascended to musical royalty and then became fodder for this blog.

Track 3: “Nightrain” ... Dedicated to Oasis

In today’s economy $1 isn’t going to get you far. But in the early 1980s, one George Washington could get you messed up.

“We were living in the Gardener Street studio, where we had one little box of a room,” said GNR bassist Duff McKagan to Hit Parader while discussing one of the band’s favorite libations and inspiration for Appetite’s third track, “Nightrain.” “We had no money but we could dig up a buck to go to this liquor store. It happened to have this great wine called Night Train Express that would f**k you up for a dollar. Five dollars and you’d be gone. We lived off this stuff.”

Oasis also did plenty of living under the influence.

With an influencial nod to The Beatles, English rock band Oasis enjoyed tossing back a few with the boys at the pub. But the group that has sold over 60 million records worldwide gets the “Nightrain” nod because following the soap opera saga of the Gallagher brothers (Liam and Noel) was like watching the derailing of a train going full speed.

Like any brothers, Liam (lead vocalist) and Noel (guitar and vocals) shared a kindred spirit to out-do each other. Unlike most brothers their moronity played out in front of fans, innocent bystanders and journalists.

Instead of punching each other in the arm when mom wasn’t looking these two would trade licks with cricket bats in the recording studio. The brothers became famous more for their antics then their music. In fact, if these two were Sopranos, one of them would have gotten whacked by Paulie Walnuts.

Among the duos greatest hits:
• When Liam backed out of the band’s gig for MTV Unplugged, Noel was forced to take on the lead vocals. Instead of healing his "sore throat" at home, Liam grabbed some brew and heckled his brother from a balcony seat.
• While on tour in 2000 after a night of drinking, Liam made claims that Noel’s daughter might not be his and instantly became a leading candidate for Uncle of the Year.
• While receiving an award from INXS’ Michael Hutchence, the band remarked, “Has-beens shouldn’t be presenting awards to gonna-bes.”
• While hopped up on crystal meth during a gig in Los Angeles (1994), Liam blasted Americans and went tambourine crazy on his brother.
• Liam threw fellow brits, The Rolling Stones, under the tour bus calling their songs, “… a pile of crap.”

Through all the breakups, bruised egos, busted teeth and banishments, the group managed to write some great music.

The band’s debut album, Definitely Maybe, entered the British charts in 1994 at No. 1. Though a little softer, their second album, (What’s the Story) Morning Glory? was a success and contributed the hits “Wonderwall” and “Don’t Look Back in Anger.” By the time their third album, Be Here Now, came out in 1997, the expectations weren’t matching the product.

Armed with a three-album deal from Sony BMG, Oasis dropped their seventh album, Dig Out Your Soul, in 2008.

No word yet on which brother plans to cut the other’s brake lines first.

Tomorrow (Jan. 29, 2009): “Out Ta Get Me” … Dedicated to Chris Gaines

51st Annual Grammy Awards Live Charity Auction
When: Feb. 6, 2009
Where: Los Angeles, Calif.
Auction Time: 8pE/5pP
What's The Deal?: The items assembled represent over 70 years of music history from early jazz greats to rock 'n' roll legends. The auction features the generously donated collection of producer Andy Budde, with an extensive amount of Rolling Stones and Beatles memorabilia. Also up for bid are stage-played guitars from David Bowie and Eric Clapton, as well as Frank Sinatra and Elton John signed recording contracts and memorabilia from Bob Dylan. A 20% buyer's premium will be added to the hammer price on individual lots $50,000 and higher, and a 25% buyer's premium on all individual lots of $0-$49,000. There will be an additional 3% buyer's premium charged for lots won on Auction Network.
Register: Click here
View Catalog: Click here     

In hommage to the tracks on Appetite for Destruction, over the next 12 days leading up to the Grammy Awards Auction (Feb. 6),  I’ll profile (and poke fun at) others, like Guns N' Roses, that ascended to musical royalty and then became fodder for this blog.

Track 2: “It's So Easy” ... Dedicated to Boy Bands

Most of us have been there.

Belting out anthems and ballads into hairbrushes with the music turned up just loud enough that we convince ourselves we sound as good as the real singers. Strumming away on a broom or air pretending we’re Pete Townshend, Jimmy Page, Jimi Hendrix or Eddie Van Halen rocking a 20,000 seat auditorium.

Where was Rock Band and Guitar Hero when I was 8?

I, like other frustrated (and less talented) wannabe rockers, dreamt of forming the ultimate garage band and making it big. Sharing toothbrushes. Eating garbage instead of three squares a day. Playing gigs for exposure, not a piece of the door action. Handing out flyers. Traveling cross country in a bus or van reaking of blood, sweat and tears.

Paying dues is as much a part of music as power chords, bridges and getting screwed by management and record labels.

So I’ve always had a fundamental problem with manufactured groups … using the word “band” would be an injustice.

Instead of having to prove your chops to get a break, all you needed was to hit a falseto, lip-synch while going through choreographed moves and possess looks that make young girls act like ... well young girls. I can’t see Angus Young or James Hetfield making the cut.

Where did we go wrong as a society that songwriting and being able to keep time was replaced by frosted tips and good fashion sense?

Yet the boy band fad, that started around the time of The Monkees, grew into a multi-million dollar making industry in the 1990s under the direction of managers like Maurice Starr (New Edition and New Kids on the Block), Lou Pearlman (Backstreet Boys and ‘N Sync) and Simon Cowell.

I’m a sucker for melody and good harmonies, so I’ve always been able to tolerate some of the songs the groups recorded, but it bothered me that it was so easy for these pre-fabs.

After a few months of shopping mall appearances, singing the national anthem at a ballpark and a well placed magazine photoshoot, these bands were seling out Madison Garden, selling millions of albums and selling out.

The Backstreet Boys proved to be “larger than life” moving over 100 million albums. NKOTB showed the “right stuff” selling 80 million and the pre-Alpha Dog Justin Timberlake fronted ‘N Sync rode “Bye Bye Bye” and “It’s Gonna Be Me” to just over 56 million.

Boys II Men was nominated for a Grammy (Best New Artist) in 1992. The Backstreet Boys received the same honor in 1999. Both lost to Marc Cohn and Lauryn Hill, respectively.

But the party didn’t last.

Members began to grow up. Voice ranges changed. Bobby Brown lost his mind and discovered CMT. Donnie Wahlberg went Hollywood and began to see dead people. Lance Bass decided he was destined to go into space. Chris "I heart Eminem" Kirkpatrick became even more cartoonish. Pearlman went to jail … shameless plug time … click here to watch the Auction Network’s coverage of the sale of Pearlman’s home.

And core audiences moved on to other scams like pyramid schemes and magic pills that help you lose 30 pounds overnight.

Tomorrow (Jan. 28, 2009): “Nightrain” … Dedicated to Oasis

51st Annual Grammy Awards Live Charity Auction
When: Feb. 6, 2009
Where: Los Angeles, Calif.
Auction Time: 8pE/5pP
What's The Deal?: The items assembled represent over 70 years of music history from early jazz greats to rock 'n' roll legends. The auction features the generously donated collection of producer Andy Budde, with an extensive amount of Rolling Stones and Beatles memorabilia. Also up for bid are stage-played guitars from David Bowie and Eric Clapton, as well as Frank Sinatra and Elton John signed recording contracts and memorabilia from Bob Dylan. A 20% buyer's premium will be added to the hammer price on individual lots $50,000 and higher, and a 25% buyer's premium on all individual lots of $0-$49,000. There will be an additional 3% buyer's premium charged for lots won on Auction Network.
Register: Click here
View Catalog: Click here     

In hommage to the tracks on Appetite for Destruction, over the next 12 days leading up to the Grammy Awards Auction (Feb. 6),  I’ll profile (and poke fun at) others, like Guns N' Roses, that ascended to musical royalty and then became fodder for this blog.

Track 1: “Welcome to the Jungle” ... Dedicated to Christopher Cross

The second greatest metal song of all time according to VH1, "Welcome to the Jungle," climbed to No. 7 in the Billboard charts and cemented the hard-partying GNR as the new bad boys of rock.

Known less for his groupie preferences and hotel room trashing, Christopher Cross also exploded onto the national scene with the release of a debut album albeit in 1979. Behind the strength of singles like “Sailing,” “Ride Like the Win” and “Never Be the Same,” Cross (and his self-titled album) made history becoming the first artist to receive all of the “Big Four” Grammy Awards (Best Record, Song, Album and New Artist) in 1981.

While there’s a part of me that has trouble even mentioning Cross and GNR in the same blog, the fact is that when the album with the pink flamingo hit (yeah, never got his infatuation with the bird), it hit big and for 18 months or so Cross was the baddest cat in the jungle.

Ladies loved him. Adult contemporary radio swooned. And the world had a more sensitive Jimmy Buffett.

Keep in mind that as we moved into the 1980s, people were fed up with Disco. Bon Scott was on the “Highway to Hell,” Led Zeppelin disbanded and only a year prior Cross had been fronting a cover band, Flash.

And as if his pick-up lines hadn’t already been bolstered (“How about you and me get out of here and go back to my place to check out my Grammy awards?”), Cross had to one-up himself scoring an Oscar for Best Original Song with “Arthur’s Them (Best That You Can Do).”

His sophomore effort, Another Page, faired OK by Cross standards thanks to the top 10 hit “Think of Laura.”

But then it was time for Cross to do a little “sailing” of his own … into the sunset. His third album, Every Turn of the World, in 1985 produced zero top 40 hits.

Tomorrow (Jan. 27, 2009): “It’s So Easy" ... Dedicated to the Boy Bands

51st Annual Grammy Awards Live Charity Auction
When: Feb. 6, 2009
Where: Los Angeles, Calif.
Auction Time: 8pE/5pP
What's The Deal?: The items assembled represent over 70 years of music history from early jazz greats to rock 'n' roll legends. The auction features the generously donated collection of producer Andy Budde, with an extensive amount of Rolling Stones and Beatles memorabilia. Also up for bid are stage-played guitars from David Bowie and Eric Clapton, as well as Frank Sinatra and Elton John signed recording contracts and memorabilia from Bob Dylan. A 20% buyer's premium will be added to the hammer price on individual lots $50,000 and higher, and a 25% buyer's premium on all individual lots of $0-$49,000. There will be an additional 3% buyer's premium charged for lots won on Auction Network.
Register: Click here
View Catalog: Click here    

I wasn’t born when Jim Brown was shredding collegiate and NFL defenses. So for me, the best running back I’ve ever watched make a defense earn it's scholarship and paycheck (sometimes at the same time) is Barry Sanders.

The NFL Hall of Famer and career Detroit Lions back had it all. Power. Speed. Humility. And the ability to make 260-pound linebackers look like they should be suiting up for the San Diego Seduction or Los Angeles Temptation of the Lingerie Football League.

Did you know that the Oklahoma State coaching staff “found” the modest and unrecruited 5-foot-8 running back while scouting other players at Wichita (Kan.) High School?  In 1988, after two seasons in Stillwater, Okla., backing up All-America tailback Thurman Thomas, Sanders led the nation by averaging 7.6 yards per carry and over 200 yards per game. En route to the Heisman Trophy that year, Sanders racked up 3,249 total yards of offense and 39 touchdowns.

Talk about dumb luck … and job security.

So as I was flipping through the Julien’s Auctions 51st Grammy Awards live charity auction catalog, I couldn’t help but think of my own Barry Sanders moment when I got to lot 101 on page 75.

I remember going into Rainbow Records in Altus, Okla., in the summer of 1987 to pick up a vinyl copy of Poison’s Look What the Cat Dragged In. On the floor next to it was an album featuring a rapist robot and the words “Appetite for Destruction.” What the hell was Guns N’ Roses? Another one of those slick Sunset Strip acts looking to cash in on the hair metal success of Motley Crue, Ratt, Dokken and Bon Jovi?

At that point in my life, if a band was endorsed by a hair spray company, I was their huckleberry. Needless to say I left the store with both LPs.

From the opening riff of "Welcome to the Jungle" that guitarist Slash came up with while living in the basement of his mother’s house to the last Steven Adler snare crash of “Rocket Queen” I was hooked. I can’t remember how many phonograph needles I wore out listening to those 12 tracks.

I’ve long stopped listening to Brett Michaels who these days is more interested in figuring out how many skanks he can cram into a tour bus for VH1's Rock of Love. But that GNR album is always in iPod rotation. In fact it’s part of my fivesome I’d take if stranded on a desert island … but that’s another blog.

Up for bid in the auction is a pencil-on-paper rendition of the image that replaced Robert Williams’s original robot cover art. Many retailers refused to stock the original GNR album unless a tamer image was used. The record label buckled (GNR hadn’t exploded yet) and Billy White Jr.’s sketch that was the basis for one of frontman Axl Rose’s tattoos, was used on subsequent pressings of an album that has gone on to sell more than 18 million copies.

The band sold over 14 million copies of the 1991 follow-up albums Use Your Illustion I and Use Your Illusion II, but after that strife, substance abuse, power struggles and Rose’s larger-than-life personality ended the ride for us all.

It was a sad end for a band that had all the earmarkings of the next Rolling Stones, Aerosmith or Beatles. So much unfulfilled promise.

As the second verse of “Welcome to the Jungle” reminds us:
“You Can Taste The Bright Lights / But You Won’t Get Them for Free.”

Which got me thinking, what other bands have had a bright future placed at their disposal but blew it, blew up or blew away?

So, in hommage to the tracks on Appetite, over the next 12 days leading up to the Grammy Awards Auction (Feb. 6),  I’ll profile (and poke fun) at others who ascended to musical royalty and then became fodder for this blog.

Tomorrow (Jan. 26, 2009): “Welcome to the Jungle” ... Dedicated to Christopher Cross

51st Annual Grammy Awards Live Charity Auction
When: Feb. 6, 2009
Where: Los Angeles, Calif.
Auction Time: 8pE/5pP
What's The Deal?: The items assembled represent over 70 years of music history from early jazz greats to rock 'n' roll legends. The auction features the generously donated collection of producer Andy Budde, with an extensive amount of Rolling Stones and Beatles memorabilia. Also up for bid are stage-played guitars from David Bowie and Eric Clapton, as well as Frank Sinatra and Elton John signed recording contracts and memorabilia from Bob Dylan. A 20% buyer's premium will be added to the hammer price on individual lots $50,000 and higher, and a 25% buyer's premium on all individual lots of $0-$49,000. There will be an additional 3% buyer's premium charged for lots won on Auction Network.
Register: Click here
View Catalog: Click here   

The Auction Network conducted a fraking cool open casting call looking for two enthusiastic Battlestar Galactica fans to be special commentators during the Battlestar Galactica Auction that will air live from the Pasadena Convention Center on Jan. 17-18, 2009. The auction is presented by Propworx and the NBC Universal Television, DVD, Music and Consumer Products Group.

Applicants auditioned both at Universal CityWalk in Universal City, Calif., and via YouTube submissions. Judges rated the fans on expertise in BSG trivia and all other matters BSG, ability to articulate thoughts and deliver commentary clearly, capability to express themselves with brevity and good camera presence.

Thanks to all who participated in this contest and to everyone who commented on the YouTube videos.

And now it’s time to reveal the winners:
• Ryan Keeton from Leesville, La.
• Lauren Osborne from San Diego, Calif.

We have also decided to add one more knuckle-dragger to the cast. Melody Mooney (Sherman Oaks, Calif.) will blog from the Pasadena Convention Center during and after the event.

To check out all the casting videos that made the cut, click here. More...

The 2nd Annual Kathy Hilton Wishing Tree auction benefiting the Make-A-Wish Foundation was a successful event, bringing in nearly $40,000 on Dec. 20, 2008. More than 111 total lots were sold through live and online bidding. Guests had the opportunity to visit Rick and Kathy Hilton’s home via Auction Network, America’s Auction Network, My Family TV and the Internet at auctionnetwork.com and bid on a number of glamorous items such as Alex Rodriguez’s autographed baseball, Lucille Ball’s tea cup, Johnny Carson’s cuff links and much more. For a complete look at the entire auction catalog and what each piece sold for, click here.
 
Some of the hot items up for auction were two tickets to a Jonas Brothers concert and a meet-and-greet which went for $1,600 and Avril Lavigne’s signed autographed guitar and signed PJs which went for $4,300. Designer clothing, handbags and accessories donated by Kathy, Paris (above) and Nicky Hilton also were a hit with one dress being sold for $700. More...